Updated: Dec 22, 2021
You did it. You pimped your Tinder profile and you got that match!
Your photos and the profile text, which in addition to the pictures reveals what makes us special, have convinced your match. Now the first step may have been taken. But the next discipline is yet to come: getting the man or woman to start the conversation and keeping it going. But what is the best way to do that on dating apps?
One thing is certain: "Hi, how are you?" is the lamest introduction of all time. It neither signals special creativity nor arouses the curiosity of our match. Just as "What are you doing here?" is not the kind of introduction that makes you want to have a little chat, since the answer is relatively obvious. What works instead? We have a few tips for Tinder, Bumble & co.
Tip 1: Don't be afraid to compliment
I would start with a compliment - but not a flat one: not slimy, but sympathetic. Something that makes the other person feel seen.
Tip 2: Make a comment on her profile text
If the profile doesn't reveal much, start there, preferably in a relaxed and humorous way ("Are you a spy here?").
If you discover exciting clues - perfect! If you have common hobbies, for example, you can start there. But also if something catches your eye that totally surprised you.
Tip 3: Ask questions to start a Tinder conversation
As in offline life, the aim of Tinder is to create a conversation. Monologues are therefore unsuitable for this. Asking the other person questions sounds natural and yet it is often forgotten. And then some people wonder why their matches don't reply any more - they simply have the impression that the other person isn't interested in them. So when you write your first message (and subsequent ones), put a question at the end that your match is happy to answer. Make sure that it can't just be answered with a yes or no - that way it's hard to get a Tinder conversation going.
It's better not to ask deep philosophical questions, as this will overwhelm you at the beginning and make it difficult to answer. You will find out in the course of time whether you have more than one hobby in common and can talk about everything and anything.
Tip 4: Just suggest a date!
If we've been in contact with each other for a while and communication is going well, I can just ask: 'What are your weekend plans?' On the one hand, it's a good example for setting up a first date. On the other hand, we find out even more about what our counterpart spends his free time doing.
Tip 5: Meet quickly
I recommend meeting as soon as possible. If we write to the person for an eternally long time and open ourselves up in the process, we tend to read something into the contact that is excessive. Our expectations keep rising and at some point the other person hardly has a chance to stand up to these expectations. In the end, we are disappointed when we finally meet. Waiting too long could also lead to the other person getting bored and losing interest.
We hope these 5 tips helped you in having better conversations on Tinder.
If you can not even get to this point because you are not getting any matches, we highly recommend you get better photos for your online dating profile, as this is the most important factor to get matches.
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